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10:21 pm - November 06, 2003 Tonight was some big meeting on campus about hate speech, and some related issues. I stumbled upon it by accident and was amazed. It sounded like some of the conversations we were having when I went to school here. I decided to leave because I recognized that I was really watching it happen as a spectator and kind of getting off on the similarities to the time I was in school here. That just seemed so wrong when I really could not tell what it was they were talking abuot, only that there was some real emotion, pain, frustration, and dissent in the room. It was theirs to resolve ya know. I think one of the hardest things about being here is all the memories of my friend Morgan. I've written about her before. She was killed in a car accident and was fucking 30. I could write for ages about Morgan and why I miss her (click here for some), but the most poignant thing here was driving by the house we used to share. Living together was a mistake. WE loved one another but definitely should not have shared space. But fuck if we did not have great times there in spite of our conflicts. And I don't really regret that I moved out in the middle of the night (I kept paying rent until folks could take over my lease). I just miss her terribly and it hurts. In the spirit of the funky child of gender insanity and feminist theory I was when I was in school, I have been thiking about writing a book series. It would be Choose Your Own Misadventure -- loosely based on the concepts of good girls gone bad or bad girls gone good. Think lesbian pulp novellas for the new millenium. the secret would be that the "bad choices" aren't all bad and the "good choices" are sometimes fascist and nasty. Here is the description of the first one: Courtney is a small-town girl from the West Coast searching for acceptance and love in the early 1980s. Eventually drawn to a life of snarling grunge rock bad boys and hard living, young Courtney takes a job at Wet Seal after her manager at Hot Dog on a Stick blows a gasket because she has pierced her lip. At Wet Seal she meets up with Ramona and Sheila, childhood friends who enjoy Sunday services at the Church of the Un-Poisoned Mind a funky, hip nondenominational christian church led by Reverend P.J. Ewing, the ex-President of Omaha's Culture Club Fan Club (think Gary Busey meets Ru Paul). Courtney is impressed by the church's "Teen Queens for Christ Club" and the "Divine Interventions Meet-Up for Alternative Sexuality," but eventually, she turns away from the hip and happy world of ParliaFunkadelic christianity. Will Courtney start her own band, rip her hose, develop a hellish guttural wail and become a brawling Hollywood casualty? Or, will she come closer to Jesus, take the "funky" out of Funky Christianity and follow a path toward conservative purity? Only you can decide in this Choose Your Own Misadventure story by Good Girl/Bad Girl Press, a Pat Robertson imprint. Now with a special preface by Pink!
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