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23:01 - Tuesday, Feb. 11, 2003 Stay tuned here for what is probably your first, and almost deifinitely your last, glimpse at a same-gender, interracial, fragrance-free, Quaker, vegetarian-friendly, wedding and Pan-Asian Southern Barbecue. The morning of the wedding was a controlled hustle. We were to converge on the reception site by 9:00 am on the dot. The whole process with the reception site had been such a challenge. We had to shell out an extra $700 to get the site long enough to get in there and get out in time for the ceremony. We had to load in our decorations, tables, plates, glasses, linens, music, alcohol, etc. We had to set up for the swing band, decorate the stage and the ceiling and the downstairs and get both catedrer number one and caterer number 2 all set up. All the while we needed to string hundreds of lights, several hundred yards of ivory tulle, and in general, just get the place looking BASHTASTIC! All of this in 2 hours. So at 6:30 and 7:00 and 8:00 in the morning, all over DC, Maryland and Virginia, a small army of friends and family members were waking up and getting in cars, hooking up with rides, and firing up their rentals to come make it happen. Polly Poodlepopper, LoDudo and I headed out after picking up Lady Bountiful, my parnter's great friend and a person I got to know abit over the weekend. She is warm, emotionally aware and a fountain of support and thoughtfulness. We arrived at the reception site at exactly 9:00. We had stopped by his aunt and uncle's house to see the flowers and load a car or two. The flowers were absolutely beautiful. We had white fresia for our boutenneires. The flowers for the centerpieces were white daisy mums and irises. The florist was a man we met at the farmer's market at Dupont Circle -- the hub of the commercial gay community in DC. At 9:00 most folks were there or just pulling up. RootBeer and Ms. Plexi, my childhood friend -- who are both known for being late -- were there on time. I know it sounds weird but it was touching that they both made it there. It felt so considerate and just like it was important enough to them to make it on time. So cool. I will spare you the list of who was there but almost 20 people came to get the building under control. The rental company was there right on time as well and was unloading by 9:00 and one second. Excellent! One vital mistake was that at some point the people who ran the place told Ms. Stitch, "No." They must not have gotten the vibe memo that this was in appropriate behavior on a day that RootBeer and Ms. Stitch had planned for for over a year. This was their wedding too! Just as an aside here, our decision to ask these two to run the show was essential to our enjoyment of the day. RootBeer is a feminist Martha Stewart on speed minus the ImClone scandal. And she is not obnoxious about it. She just makes it happen. Ms. Stitch is both practical and driven. She held so much together and was an essential creative activist for a full year. We were so grateful to have these two on board. The people divided into crews: Centerpeice Crew: Flowers into cobalt blue vases surrounded by metallic star ribbon-wire, Swag Crew: Twisting the tulle and the lights and stringing them across the hall to meet at a center point, Buffet and Beer Crew: self-explanatory; Table Crew: Setting tables, placing our wedding cd on tables and moving tables around. The Wedding CD Shooting Star (Cris Williamson), Sound Circle Dream a Little Dream of Me, Mamas and the Papas Rainbow Connection, Kermit the Frog I'll Stand By You, The Pretenders Calling You, Jevetta Steele from Bagdad Cafe Whenever You're Away from Me, Olivia Newton-John from Xanadu I'll Never Tell, Anya and Xander from Buffy Ms. Celie's Blues, Margaret Avery from The Color Purple Can't Get Enough of Your Love Baby, Barry White The Way you Look Tonight, Frank Sinatra At Last, Etta James Mystery, Indogo Girls Crazy Love, Van Morrison You Can Sleep While I Drive, K.D. Lang and Melissa Etheridge Walking After Midnight, Patsy Cline At This Point in My Life, Tracy Chapman Seasons of Love, The Cast of Rent Ain't No Mountain High Enough, Cast of Sister Act II. One of the ways we brought ourselves into the reception was to name the tables after various writers, activists, performers, and politicians who have inspired us. Upon arriving at the reception, our guests were to find the name of the table they were going to sit at on a chart and then go sit at the corresponding table. Our tables were: Mee Moua -- for a table with many Minnesotans Margaret Cho -- for the wedding party table Adrienne Rich -- for my friends from college Frederick Douglass Barbara Lee - for some of our California friends and family and Paul Wellstone It all came together so beautifully. OK Let's get married . . .
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